So often I read about the steps women should take when facing
divorce but what about the men? Below are just a few thoughts on the process from
the Husband's viewpoint.
1. Spend as much time with your children as you can. If you aren't
that involved because your wife does "everything" then get involved.
Attend their games & activities, attend a doctor's appointment
if possible, be involved in their school activities, projects & homework,
do fun things with them but also be a parent. You don't have to become
"Disney Dad" to show your commitment.
2. Encourage your spouse to obtain employment if not already working or
to seek advancement in her career.
3. Consider the timing of starting any new business opportunities. Leaving
a well paying job to start up a new business could be a financial disaster.
Consider how much overtime you are willing to work as it may be utilized in
4. If you are having emotional problems or need professional support enroll
in therapy. The Courts are very supportive of parties who recognize their
deficiencies and get help.
5. Avoid badmouthing your spouse to the children. Try your best not to
put your children in the middle of the divorce. Do not share financial
information with the children or make them the messenger to their mother.
6. If you have
assets that you came into the marriage with such as a bank account or a house begin to look for or request from
the financial institution statements from or around the date of marriage.
If you owned a house before the marriage locate the closing statement
from when you bought the house and if you sold it from the sales closing.
7. Avoid excessive spending on foolish items which will tend to show that
you have large amounts of discretionary income.
There are many more things to consider but these are just a few. Equally
important is the selection of an experienced matrimonial attorney. Obtain
a consultation and assess the ability of the attorney, experience and
whether you have confidence in the attorney.